Having just turned 66, I have had time to reflect on my life … both the years past and the years ahead. . Not quite as difficult as it was for me when I turned 65 but time is fleeting and who knows what tomorrow will bring. What paths will I and my husband follow and what questions might be answered in the years ahead? The more I think about it all the less the answers are clear.
I have been told I am quite ‘deep’ and have an inquiring mind. I have to agree and with that I ask…
When may I just go ahead and buy those God awful ‘old lady’ shoes that I wouldn’t be caught dead in…because they are just the most comfortable shoes for my tired weary feet?
When will it be ok for me to just ignore my ever-expanding waistline to have that glass of wine?
When will it be ok to just say that my body doesn’t do what it did when I was 45?
When may be ok to not mind if my husband puts on white socks with sandals?
When will I stop glancing at other women to compare …..like the other day I saw a lady coming off the elevator to go out to the beach. I thought to myself, “Wow, she has let herself go! I wonder how old she is?”…but then I realized it was my reflection in the glass door! Whoa….surprised the heck out of me!
When may I actually ask my doctor how old he is because he looks like Doogie Howser?
When may I just stop hiding the fact that when I get out of bed in the morning I feel like I need to be cracked? HELP! My legs don’t work.
When may I stop hiding my arms and just buy sleeveless shirts because it is 100 degrees in the shade?
(Oprah has nothing on me! Ah ha! My arms have that hangy skin thingies underside that cannot be exercised away.
When may I just get into bed because it is more provocative than going to that finest restaurant?
When may I say out loud that every hour of driving requires a rest stop to 1. go potty and 2. stretch so that I do not require assistance getting out of the damn car? A walker is looking pretty good.
When may we go to the early bird specials and fit in with all the other customers?
Most important question I keep asking myself is…
When may I let all my grey hair grow in and just stop dyeing it all?
Ahhhhhhhhhhhh to have all the answers to these difficult and life long questions. It is a burden to me and to us all.
The answers will come I am sure if I wait long enough. “They” say we become wiser as we get older. We will cross that line into old age like it or not. Until then I will pour myself a nice glass of Pinot Noir and sit my butte on the deck overlooking the ocean and ponder. Ponder this and ponder that. Ho Hum. It’s tough but somebody has to do it!